It's been more than a year since I dedicated a Wacky Wednesday to the Golden Throats.
Well, friend, that's too long!
What's a "Golden Throat?" you might ask. As I've said before:
Back in the '80s and '90s, when Rhino Records was actually a cool label,
they released a series of albums called Golden Throats. These nutball
compilations featured movie and TV stars, sports heroes and every stripe
of cheesy celebrity singing ham-fisted versions of songs they had no
business singing. Pop tunes, rock 'n' roll hits, country song, whatever.
Nothing was sacred and nothing was safe from the Golden Throats.
Because of the exposure from the Rhino series, some of these
unintentionally hilarious songsters became notorious and ironically hip.
Think William Shatner -- the Elvis of the Golden Throats! -- and his
over-the-top renditions of "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" and "Mr.
Tambourine Man."
So, let's start today with Mamie Van Doren dissing the beatniks, as only Mamie could:
Another singing blonde bombshell of the mid 20th Century was Jayne
Mansfield. Although her vocal talent wasn't her best-known attribute, it
might not be fair to label her as a "Golden Throat." She was a classically
trained violinist and pianist and she actually could sing.
Jack Nicholson sings "La Vie En Rose" in the 2003 movie Something's Gotta
Give."
Super model -- but not so super singer -- Naomi Campbell meets T Rex
Finally, here are William Frawley and Vivian Vance -- who portrayed the beloved Fred &
Ethel Mertz in I Love Lucy -- as OG Golden Throats in 1953. (Sorry, the person who posted this doesn't allow embeds. You have to click on "Watch on YouTube" in lower right corner.)
Sunday, April 11 , 2021 KSFR, Santa Fe, NM Webcasting! 10 p.m. to midnight Sundays Mountain Time Host: Steve Terrell 101.1 FM
Email me during the show! terrell(at)ksfr.org
Here's my playlist :
OPENING THEME: Let It Out (Let it All Hang Out) by The Hombres
Louie Louie by Richard Berry & The Pharaohs
Pills by Bo Diddley
Cosmic Thing by The B52s
Foot in Mouth by The Routes
New Socks by MFC Chicken
I'm on the Dish But I Ain't No Rag by The Toy Trucks
About a week ago I got in a discussion on Facebook with my friend
Max about the magic of doo wop. I sent him a link to an old piece I wrote in
1994 about meeting Gaynel Hodge in Phoenix the night before that year's
Lollapalooza (re-published on this blog a mere 17 years ago).
Afterwards I remembered that just a few months before encountering Gaynel, I'd
written a Terrell's Tune-up column about a wonderful Rhino Records box set
that collected four CDs worth worth of doo wop classics.
So what the heck? Here's that column, which hasn't been published since its
original appearance in the Santa Fe New Mexican's Pasatiempo.
I'll insert a few videos and links.
Like most folks my age, I first became cognizant of doo wop music in the late
1960s through such comedy groups as Sha Na Na and Frank Zappa's Ruben and The Jets.
In other words, for years, doo wop seemed like a quaint joke. Ram a lama ding
dong. You, know, stuff like that.
But one night last winter I was driving alone on a rainy night, listening, for
reasons I don't remember, to an oldies station, which happened to play “I Only
Have Eyes for You” by The Flamingos.
There's a strumming of three guitar chords, followed by the steady beat of a
piano. Singer Tommy Hunt comes in singing effortlessly, My love must be
a kind of blind love/I can't see anyone but you , as if he's got to justify
what he has to say.
Then the group responds with unintelligible, almost discordant syllables, like
some kind of eerie voodoo chant. All this before Hunt starts the first verse,
invoking celestial bodies.
By the end of the song, all five Flamingos are gushing the beautiful melody,
the falsetto going nuts as if possessed by the loa of high register. It
almost seems that the group is having the aural equivalent of a simultaneous
orgasm, right there in the echo chamber.
But way before the song got to this point on that rainy Santa Fe night, I was
transported into the past, reliving a buried memory of being a 5-year-old kid,
listening to a radio late at night to a sound that was alluring and forbidding
at the same time, just like Lou Reed's Jenny.
The Penguins, The Moonglows, The Orioles, The Five Satins/The deep,
forbidden music they'd be longing for ...
And, as if by magic, just a couple of weeks later Rhino Records announced its
new four-disc Doo Wop Box.
In recent years, with all-oldies radio, recurring '50s revivals and all, much
of the mystery and power has been sapped out of this strange and wonderful
music.
Therefore, it is best to look at Rhino's Doo Wop Box with the eyes of
Rene and Georgette, wide-eyed immigrants entering a new world, where almost
every song is an adventure. Even overly familiar tunes, “16 Candles,”
“Only You,”“Earth Angel,” regain some of their magic if listened to in this
spirit.
Listening to the four hours-plus of music in this collection, one realizes
there are definite traits of the doo wop Universe.
Sometime it seems like a world in which every utterance, every movement is
painstakingly planned, every harmony in place. But, then, before your very
ears, it will seem to break down into near anarchy, a falsetto screaming like
a banshee, the bass man grunting noises that seem to come from deep within the
earth.
There's an underlying religious atmosphere. Although God is rarely mentioned
after The Orioles' “Crying in the Chapel.”
There's also evidence of nature worship. For instance, Dion asks the stars up
above why it hurts to be a teen-ager in love.
Doo wop singers tend to give themselves mythic powers. They always are willing
to climb the highest mountain and swim the deepest sea.
And sometimes a group almost will prove itself to be superhuman with songs
that are downright transcendental.
There's “My True Story” by a Brooklyn group called The Jive Five. The
sad little love story of Earl and Sue might seem lethally corny under any
other context. But, when Eugene Pitts wails, “And you will cry cryyyyyyy
cryyyyyyyyy ...” any listener who ever has had his heart ripped out will know
this is the real thing.
Then there's “Since I Don't Have You” by The Skyliners, a white group from
Pittsburgh. Forget about Axl Rose's limp cover. He's outgunned by Jimmy
Beaumont who by the end of the song shouts “You-ooh! You-oooh!
You-oooooh!” like a wounded accuser while Janet Vogel sings a near aria
like a siren of the cosmos in the background. [Note from 2021: I'm not sure
why The Skyliners, in this 1959 TV appearance are dressed up like
they're serenading Marshal Dillon and Miss Kitty at the Longbranch Saloon!]
Despite some self-conscious goofery here and there, the most appealing thing
about doo wop is its sincerity. When Johnny Maestro (now there's a rock 'n'
roll moniker!) of The Crests sings, “You are the prettiest, loveliest girl
I've ever seen,” to his 16-year-old birthday girl, you know he means every
word. And because of the forceful way he sings it, a listener will believe
Maestro will feel that way about his sweetie for the rest of his
life.
Sometimes simple sincerity seems magical in a jaded world.
xxx
Here's Johnny Maestro & The Crests with their big hit. No Matt Gaetz jokes, please.
Tuesday, April 6, 2021 KSFR, Santa Fe, NM Webcasting! 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. Tuesdays Mountain Time Substitute Host: Steve Terrell 101.1 FM
Email me during the show!
terrel(at)ksfr.org
Here's my playlist :
(Background Music: Back at the Chicken Shack by Jimmy Smith)
Honey Hush by Big Joe Turner
Sittin' on it All the Time by Wynonie Harris
Drunk by Jimmy Liggins
Watermelon Man by Johnnie Taylor
Party Town by Bobby Charles
Foolin' Myself by Billie Holiday with Teddy Wilson
Hang It Up by King Coleman
High Blood Pressure by The Marathons
(Background Music Back at the Chicken Shack by Charlie Musselwhite)
Total Destruction of your Mind by Swamp Dogg
Crazy Lover by Richard Berry
I Smell Trouble by Ike & Tina Turner
I'll Go Crazy by James Brown
Jivin' Around by Andre Williams
Ain't Nobody Here But Us Chickens by Louis Jordan
Chicken Shack Boogie by The Five Scamps
(Background Music Back at the Chicken Shack by Robert Cray)
Reefer Madness Set
Light Up by Buster Bailey
Feelin' High and Happy by Hot Lips Paige
Jack, I'm Mellow by Trixie Smith
Marihuana Boogie by Lalo Guerro
Save the Roach for Me by Buck Washington
Reefer Head Woman by Jazz Gillum
Weed Smoker's Dream by The Harlem Hamfats
Lotus Blossom (Sweet Marijuana) by Julia Lee & Her Boyfriends
If You're a Viper by Fats Waller
The G Man Got the T Man by Jack McVea
The Man from Harlem by Cab Calloway
Dopey Joe by Slim & Slam
All the Jive is Gone by Andy Kirk & His 12 Clouds of Joy
(Background Music Blue Reefer Blues by Richard M. Jones)
Sunday, April 4 , 2021 KSFR, Santa Fe, NM Webcasting! 10 p.m. to midnight Sundays Mountain Time Host: Steve Terrell 101.1 FM
Email me during the show! terrell(at)ksfr.org
Here's my playlist :
OPENING THEME: Let It Out (Let it All Hang Out) by The Hombres
It's All Going to Pot by Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard & Jamey Johnson
Marijuana Logic by Pocket Fishrmen
Marijuana, The Devil's Flower by Holly Golightly & The Brokeoffs
Run Through the Jungle by The Gun Club
Into the Drink by Mudhoney
Move It by T. Tex Edwards
Lipstick Frenzy by Lovestruck
Touch and Go by The Fleshtones
Ring Dang Do by Sam the Sham & The Pharaohs
Can Your Pussy Do the Dog by The Cramps
Peter Cottontail by The Bubbadinos
Haint Blue by Churchwood
Git Back in the Truck by The Hickoids
That's Alright with Me by Knoxville Girls
Graveyard Chicks Are Easy by The Dead Beat Jacks
Call Me by Southern Culture on the Skids
Can't Push a River by Joe "King" Carrasco
Blink of an Eye by The Routes
How Low Do You Feel by Ray Campi
Switchin' Gears by Bloodshot Bill
Trapped in a Nightmare by Simon Stokes & Hammerlock
Break a Guitar by Ty Segall
Dancing on my Knees by The Yawpers
Night of the Meek by Imperial Wax
Julie's Sixteenth Birthday by John Bult
Sonny Boy by Randy Newman
Good Morning Little School Girl by Sonny Boy Williamson (John Lee Curtis)
Fattening Frogs for Snakes by Sonny Boy Williamson (Rice Miller)
I'll Be All Smiles Tonight by Loretta Lynn
When I Was a Cowboy by Peter Case
Cajun Stripper by Doug Kershaw
CLOSING THEME: Over the Rainbow by Jerry Lee Lewis
