Monday, December 08, 2014

A New Gregg Turner Kickstarter Album

Brace yourself, Bridget, my Angry Samoan crony Gregg Turner has launched a new Kickstarter project for a new collection of songs that so far exist only in his troubled mind.

He's calling it "Chartbusters!" and. as he expains,  that's ...

Only suitable to follow the last one: Plays The Hits. Lotsa catchy melodics ("Franz Kafka"), some Del Shannon-inspired doo-wops (I beg indulgence for the comparison), a Roky Erickson rocker or two (the "Stand For The Fire Demon"-ish "Kremlin Dog" as well as a cover of "I Walked With A Zombie") and even a kids' song called "Hide And Seek" with my 11-year old daughter Nico joining in on the chorus !  Hey - and whatever happened to Sheila Klein and Marsha Bronson, Lou Reed's graduating class of 1967? Check out "The Box" for what will be the "Gifted" iconic/sonic sequel update 48 years later (pushing the boundary of blasphemy, I know).

Sammy the Spatula and Whitey discuss options
And yes, there's a new video featuring dramatic interpretations from the collection of weirdos I've dubbed the "Satan's Bride Players," including an Oscar-worthy (Oscar Meyer, that is) performance by ace thespian, ME. It's not only a cinematographic masterpiece, it's an incisive behind-the-scenes look at cutting-edge behavioral-health practices, 

(Sorry it's not on Youtube, at least not yet, so you'll have to watch it on the Kickstarter site.)

So check it out, Unlike many crowd-funding scams you might have read about recently, this one's reasonable. $15 bucks get you a coy of the CD, expected to be released next summer. And bigger contributions gets you prizes (including a "personal harassing phone call" from the Mean Nurse you'll meet in the video. (Who looks a lot like Satan's Bride herself.)

Discaimer: I'm writing this post not in my usual role as critic, but as a cheap hustler for a pal. Since I'm involved in the video etc., any pretense of critical integrity here would be an insult to us all.


  1. Anonymous11:08 PM

    Steve, as you probably know your performance as Sammy "the Spatula" Solerino has angered many Sicilian-Americans. Not only do you look about as Italian as Billy Gibbons, your accent is more reminiscent of a buckaroo from Pecos than a goombah from Newark. My cousin, Frankie "the Fork" Battaglia will be paying you a...what should I call it.?...lemme think....I got it...a "courtesy call'...yeah, a courtesy call over the weekend. He'll be straightening you out about certain annoying stereotypes perpetrated by films such as this and what you need to do to make amends. By the way, somewhat on the subject--how good a swimmer are you? Your pal, "Whitey."

  2. Anonymous10:04 AM

    Explain? EXPLAIN? Frankie "the Fork" gets very, shall we say, STRESSED out when people start explaining. Better to keep your yap shut and pray to the deity of your choice. Then, if you're lucky, you MIGHT get to keep your ears on either side of your head instead of some novel configuration that scares children and house pets. Your pal, "Whitey."


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